Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Found.

The clouds have been lifted.  Today is a beautiful, clear, blue-skied day.  

These past few weeks, my mind has been ruled by the evil monster of self-doubt and anxiety (I have yet to name this beast), causing me to seriously consider leaving and give up this whole profession.   The cancerous thought that began in your mind, sinks down into your heart, and eventually leaks into your soul.  And as hard as you try, no matter how many mantras you chant or spiritual books you've read, it doesn't soothe.  The remedy is no where to be found.

Yet, the small, ounce sized part of you that is buried beneath black lies makes you keep going.  Even when you don't want to.  And you pick yourself up, and drive through traffic, drag you feet up the stairs and find yourself in a classroom.  A classroom you've been to hundreds of times, full of people who have seen you laugh, and cry and everything in between.  These are the people who know you for who you really are.

And you find yourself again.

And it feels like home. 

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